I have no love left

Piss soaked bed isn't moldy, we have those waterproof things you put on it so there's no mold but she's incontinent AND refusing to go change her diapers often - I guarantee you some of that stuff is soaked in, no way it isn't. But there's literally no way to avoid this fate short of buying a new bed every day. Bed is "ok" and if you didn't know you probably wouldn't notice except for the smell (although that might be old diapers idk) but I know. And it bothers me A LOT.

It's not fine in the sense most people wouldn't live like that (I think?) but it's fine as in not a biohazard and probably the best you can hope for with someone who often refuses to take a shower or change their clothes, spits out food everywhere, leaves boogers/whatever else everywhere. Idk how to explain that but this room is just so gross to me and while my disgust is out of proportion I know that it's not entirely in my head either. Then there are all the sticky porridge bowls and pots everywhere in the kitchen... Those drive me crazy too because I refuse to clean it and mum will do it only after a day or so.

I'm sorry if it comes off dramatic and I didn't state that enough but a lot of this is absolutely a me problem. It just bothers me endlessly, to the point of showering if I'm in that room, feeling like everything there is tainted etc. none of that is appropriate response and I might have gone insane already but it is what it is for me...

"and it's just a "you" problem, I hope you can sort it out and know you're not helpless"

As long as she's here or I'm here nothing about that can be sorted out. It's just a matter of one of us outlasting the other I guess

/r/dementia Thread Parent