I was diagnosed at age 8 by a top neurology department, was never told. They decided to only tell me about a deliberately false ASD diagnosis that was only provided to get accommodations at school, but I was never clued into that, even when I was going through therapy and whatnot as an adult. Was also told all my medical records were destroyed, but thankfully, they weren't, they were just very difficult to obtain. Otherwise, I'd never have known. It's extremely frustrating. They gave a little 9 year old kid multiple off label drugs that never should've been prescribed, but never once considered stimulants. They went to alternative medicine cranks, but never a proper psychiatrist. But my brother was bad at academics, so he got treated properly!

I want to be angry, but I also have to remember context. My parents aren't educated people. They're just sober Boomers with their own demons that tried to do better than their violent alcoholic parents before them. That whole generation is a fucking disaster when it comes to this stuff. It's all just, bottle it up and forget it exists outside an active crisis. This was a few years after the ADA passed, schools didn't know what they were doing. The ACA was a decade out, and insurance companies fought absolutely everything related to behavioral health. They really did think those records were destroyed. It wasn't deceit. I was even asked if I wanted them at 18, and I didn't at the time. There was a legitimate fear those records would be used against me, because until 2010, they would have been. And honestly, they still could be if the Supreme Court isn't de-radicalized after the election.