Xyllinus,
Not sure if you're still reading this, but I just wanted to show my support.
First off, I'm sorry that you had to go through all that. And I'm sorry that you're facing a barrage of negative comments at this time. Though I imagine that most of the commenters have good intentions. Medical folks tend to think in an analytical, cut the bullshit manner – What went wrong? Why did it happen? What could have been done to prevent it? I doubt many of them have actually experienced the kind of predicament that you have. Though our situations are different, I think you and I have trekked through a similar path to where we are today.
I'm a recent US MD grad. No kids. 32 MCAT. 3.5 GPA from state school. Also from poor family. My parents thought I was too dumb for medicine – I had actually studied for the MCAT without telling them to avoid the bullshit comments they would be shooting my way. Then when I was struggling during the school year, my parents would use those against me. In the extreme situation, I was even told that I'd be better off dead. As you can imagine, I have no parental support. I was and always will be alone.
I also failed to match this year (Mar 2015). I applied to 150 or so FM programs across the US. My red flags are 1 step 1 failure, 2 step 2 ck failures, time off from school. And I submitted my ERAS in mid October (after I got my ck scores). I got 1 interview. Then SOAP came and went like the wind. Then the school and I bid our farewells.
During med school, I found that I had a lot of problems concentrating. I attributed this to a lack of interest, as I was constantly in the bottom. The worse I did, the less interested I became. And the vicious cycle continued. I eventually sought help for studying troubles. I was diagnosed with ADHD, but I refused the diagnosis and refused meds. I always viewed ADHD as an excuse for laziness as I've seen how students abuse the diagnosis firsthand. I just accepted that I have below average talent and / or intelligence. I remember taking an IQ test in elementary school, and it turned out to be 85. Maybe that score is more valid than I had imagined.
Starting in M3 year, I had the pleasure of embarking on my own oncological adventure. Low risk of cancer – but I still have to see Oncology every once in a while just to make sure. The nurse at student health knows me on a first name basis whenever she sees me. Also during M3 year, I started taking care of a loved one who had major psych problems – we're talking self harm, substance abuse, Borderline. Imagine sacrificing you’re your limited resources to help someone who doesn't appreciate a damn thing you do (and even have the cops called claiming abuse) – all to prevent said person from suicide. All this while facing an upcoming Shelf exam.
Anyway, at this point, you're absolutely correct in your assessment regarding our options. They're extremely limited. Anything related to pharmaceutical companies, CDC, or FDA require MD's who have finished residency. I haven't done research in a long time, so I don’t qualify for any research-based post bac programs.
At the moment, I'm working in manual labor, which is ironically what my dad had said that I would be best suited for. I tried applying for government help, but because I don't have a kid and am an able-bodied non-minority, my application is likely immediately tossed. So now I have to decide whether it's even worth it to try again. Like you said, it'll just become tougher next year. I'd have to expend even more resources that I don't have – this means volunteering and / or getting more degrees, according to advisors. Unfortunately, I don't have the ability to pull money out of thin air to finance this kind of endeavor. And would there be any use? Why would any residency program want me at this point?
I'm used to rejection, so I have no problem abandoning clinical medicine if that is not where I'm meant to be. A good friend told me that I have been through enough shit to last two lifetimes. I don't know if he's right, but I feel that I've definitely been through enough to start looking at the positives – to start making that lemonade.
If you need someone to talk to, feel free to contact me.