I'm non-binary and have been out for a long time. I have a LOT of specific advice, but if there's one thing to tell it's this. It's obvious but it bears repeating. Don't jump on a transphobic bandwagon just because other people are on it. You are a real person and it's just as bad for you to beat yourself up as it is for anyone else to. You aren't fake, it isn't silly. If your rhetoric sucks, even if it seems to be making it worse, it's not your fault. There are a lot of things we take for granted, which were we interrogated about them, we would have trouble explaining, but which are obviously true. Gender isn't a rational thing that can be argued out of, and the only thing you'll get out of trying is feeling like shit. You'll need a think skin, and the only way for that to happen is to have self-confidence, and to learn where to draw lines. Open-mindedness is generally a good thing, but there comes a point when people are just wrong. I'm not gonna pretend like you can just not care what other people think, at least until you're used to being out, but give yourself some credit.