Over repeated question, but it would still help to answer!

I didn't intend this to become a step-by-step seduction manual, but it has.

It's really tempting, especially when you're younger and don't have a network of gay friends and feel like you're in an endless sea of heterosexuals, to want to explicitly ask someone if they're gay or tell people you're gay. You DON'T have to. Especially for people who are younger and may not yet defined their sexuality, being explicit about it can spook them. If you're 17 and self-actualized enough to know you're gay, you're way ahead of most people. Recognize that, and deal with others accordingly.

You two already spend a lot of time together in a mental state that takes the edge off inhibitions and insecurity. That's a great start. Something I wish I'd recognized when I was younger is this - people are intensely aware of their sense of touch. If you're touching someone, they KNOW it. For example, if you're sitting at a table eating with a bunch of friends and your knee is resting against the leg of the person sitting beside you, they know it. If they allow it to remain there, it's intentional. It's never an accident. Insecurity will make you wonder if it's a fluke, but it's never a fluke. If your body is touching someone else's and they allow it, it's on purpose. So touch him in casual situations and see how he reacts.

And I don't mean look him in the eyes longingly and touch his face. I mean just find ambiguous and casual reasons to touch him when you're alone together and notice how he reacts. One of my approaches is, whenever I leave the room and come back in, I'll walk up behind someone, stand behind them, and casually put my hands on their shoulders while continuing to talk to them about whatever subject. Give their shoulders a few friendly squeezes. Who doesn't like a shoulder rub, right? If someone is enjoying your hands on them, you'll know it. If their shoulders lean into your hands, just keep doing what you're doing. No matter how coy someone is, if they like it, they'll hardly be able to help themselves from saying, "that feels good". If you get a positive response, work their shoulders and neck for a while and let your hands push down past his shoulders onto his arms or gently push his body forward and get his back.

If your sitting on the couch with him and you've been smoking and talking, while you continue talking, lay down on your back and rest your head on his leg, closer to his knee than his crotch, stare up at the ceiling and continue talking like it's no big deal - you're just relaxing. If it's weird to him, he'll either say something or find an excuse to get up. If he says it's weird, you can always pass it off - you were just trying to get comfortable. If he does get up to pee or whatever, let him, but stay in exactly the same spot. If he sits back down right where he was before, where you have to lift your head up for him to sit down, it's a certain sign he likes your head on his leg. This time, put you head closer to his crotch and just keep talking like it's nothing. If he sits down in another chair, you know you're barking up the wrong tree, but if he sits down in the same place, you're probably onto something.

As you talk and chat, find excuses to lean up and reposition casually, and when you lay your head back down on his leg, put it progressively closer to his dick each time until you're basically resting your head in that pocket where his leg meets his hip, where every time you move your head a little, it presses against his junk. I can't tell you how often this has helped me figure out someone's actual intentions, and not once do you have to put them on the spot by asking if they're gay. Dicks don't lie, and if you're intermittently shifting the weight of your head around his crotch, you'll be able to tell if his dick gets hard. If it does, put you hand behind your head, like you're resting your head in your hand, buy now it's the back of your hand and your fingers that are resting on his dick, pushed down by the weight of your head. Move your fingers around a little. Or another good move is to grab one of his free hands and massage it while you're talking and resting your head on his leg. If things are going this direction, the sexual tension will become fucking unbearable, and it'll naturally escalate from being ambiguous to overtly sexual. Next thing you know, he'll have his cock buried in your throat. Or it could result in absolutely nothing. Who knows?

Never be pushy and be ready to cease at any time - you never want to make someone feel uncomfortable. But by slowly escalating, you'll be able to get your answer without ever explicitly asking. If it does turn overtly sexual, do NOT over analyze it or rehash it with him. He could be gay. Or maybe just horny. Don't have any expectations. Just have fun. If you talk about it at all, just reassure him that it's between you and him only.

/r/askgaybros Thread