God, this is such a tough situation, and I know you are probably reeling and feeling a million things at once, and I really don't want to add guilt to that list, but I feel so bad for your parents right now. Please just call them and tell them that you love them and will talk about it when you're ready.

They are living their worst nightmare right now (well, second worst). After losing their first child, they feel like they're losing you. You are their miracle. You were the thing that brought them back to life after they experienced the worst possible thing that can happen to a person. I know you feel lied to and betrayed, but people deal with tragedy in different ways, often inappropriate or unhealthy ways, like denial and repression. I know it seems like they sort of gave you the life that was meant for her, but I can only imagine what it must have felt like, to have a second chance at the family they always wanted after thinking it was lost forever.

If you didn't have her name, would you still feel this way? I totally get why that seems weird and would make you uncomfortable, but you should know that, while not very common these days, it isn't that unusual for children to be named after deceased siblings. My great aunt is named after one.

My heart just aches for you because I can only imagine how you must feel, and you have every right to those feelings. I know it might feel like it, but I promise you, that no matter your name, or what toys you had, you are not a replacement to your parents. You're a miracle.

Please call your mom. Or at least send her text. Thinking of the pain they must be in right now makes me sick to my stomach.