> you're not entirely sure about hers. Or why she has developed this phobia.

She is uncomfortable talking about this, I respected that.

> Do you realise what a really bad phobia is like

I do, yes.

> Instead of pressuring her to drive despite knowing she has a paralyzing fear of it, you offer to help her find appropriate therapy to help her with her phobia.

I never pressured her to do it, all I wanted, including in my post, is that she understands it's smth I really hate, and would appreciate if she could stop assuming I should drive her everywhere. She wants to go out with a friend 150km away, and got pissed I wasn't immediately ok driving her there. Her friend could come to her place, maybe? Or meet in town? There are alternatives to meeting, just not to going to her friends place. I want her to understand there is a non-binary situation, that just because I can drive doesn't mean it's fine because I don't have a paralysing phobia. That ability to doesn't mean it's easy.

I've also offered to drive her to any therapist of her choice, and recommended one, but she has refused.

> How can you know so little about her after an entire year of dating. Have you ever actually really listened to her?

Because she will not talk about it, and I respect that.

> You're sounding more and more like an insensitive jerk.

I respect your opinion, and we are all to some extent someone else's jerk. I respect her phobia, never pressured her into anything, and only asked that she understand that being able to do smth isn't the same as it being easy - you can read a translated transcript of a talk I had with her in an another post. I know little of the why and how because she has vehemently made it clear that it's an off-limit subject, and offer within the best of my ability all support I can with this issue. But it's also true that I'm not her chauffeur, and that I'm not at fault for the pandemic, or the lack of public transports.