PC giveaway! Mini itx system!

I am a 3d artist who is born in a country where 3d artists aren't paid so well. I dont have a job yet but my goal is to get a decent job by the end of this year. I currently have a desktop which has a gtx 1050ti and r5 1600. Covid struck family business pretty hard, so my father is trying to get a big loan to help the business survive. He told me to buy a good laptop from some of that loan money, but since then I have been thinking, is it worth buying some expensive laptop from loan money where I will barely manage myself with my salary? How long will it take to repay that amount? To make matters worse, I am hardstuck on one of the steps in making a character for a few days now. This is making me question my ability now. Idk. I got excited when I saw a mini itx as I can travel with it (the state I live in has 0 opportunities for 3d so I have to move to another state), but it has an older i7, which won't be much of a boost to my current cpu I think. It will be great for gaming though, so don't choose me. Choose someone who can't afford a pc and haven't even got to experience older gems like ac black flag, witcher 3, gta 5(You get the idea). I was once there when I was younger so I can imagine the happiness that person will feel when he/she gets it. I am not even sure why I am commenting here in this thread and this subreddit regarding my situation, but I dont want to delete it now after writing so much. I'll delete it in a day or two. If anybody felt something like I am feeling right now, please tell me what did you do.

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