Why?

My work takes me to some very rough areas in Houston, Dallas, and San Antonio. I am not going to be a victim to some bullshit robbery or car jacking. In 2004 I was taking pictures of fire damage on a strip center in the 5th ward of Houston. Three guys walked up to me and started to ask me questions about my camera and tried to surround me. One had a knife in his hand behind his back so I drew my Glock to the sul position and told them I was just leaving. They changed their minds about my camera when they saw my Glock 19. My work also takes me to some very remote areas of Texas. In 1999 I was visiting an oil field in south Texas near Benavidas. We were in two trucks and we were driving way to fast down a dimly lit caliche road when the lead truck hit a cow. It was bad, the truck was totaled, my buddy was concused with a broken arm, and the cow was broken in half. So, we shot the cow as opposed to leaving there just to sit next to the totaled truck and take hours to die and took my buddy to a hospital in Corpus Christi. You never know what you might stumble apon in the middle of nowhere.

Do I feel different when I don't have it on me, and how do I feel?

If I leave it at home I am conscious that it is missing. Like if I left my wallet or pocket knife at home. I don't freak out of feel scared I just make sure I don't get put into a situation where I am going to need it.