Alabama - Lynyrd Skynyrd
Alaska - Snow Dogs and The Proposal
Arizona - My personal favorite state. Lots of amazing natural beauty. It's almost all desert.
Arkansas - They get pissed if you pronounce it Are-Kansas
California - It is gigantic
Colorado - Weed, mountains, and the Denver Broncos
Connecticut - Lots of rich, white people, + Bridgeport and New Haven. I hear New London is pretty bad, too.
Delaware - Takes like an hour to drive through, North to South.
Florida - Old people, rednecks, and Latinos
Georgia - Like a nicer version of Alabama
Hawaii - Hawaii 5-0
Idaho - ?
Illinois - Chicago and not a ton much else.
Indiana - Home to Larry Bird and the Pacers, as well as the town/city of Gary, Indiana.
Iowa - Field of Dreams
Kansas - Where Dorothy is from.
Kentucky - Where Louisville Sluggers are made.
Louisiana - Cajuns, Voodoo, and New Orleans
Maine - Lobsters and almost-Canada.
Maryland - Baltimore is pretty cool but a lot of it is poverty stricken, and the rest of it is pretty bland. D.C. is like 40 minutes from Baltimore.
Massachusetts - Massholes. Dropkick Murphys. Red Sox. Irish.
Michigan - White people and Jim Harbaugh.
Minnesota - White people and Joe Mauer.
Mississippi - Brett Favre (pronounced Farve).
Missouri - St. Louis and Kansas City are on opposite sides of the states. Not much in between.
Montana - Big Sky.
Nebraska - ?
Nevada - Las Vegas and legal prostitution, which ironically is not legal in Vegas.
New Hampshire - Wannabe Vermont.
New Jersey - A desolate wasteland. DiPiero's is cool, though.
New York - Ah, my home state. I'm from the Bronx, so I speak from a city perspective, so pretty much anything north of like Pleasantville are the boonies. Long Island has a lot of rich people in Suffolk county. Westchester has its shitholes, but overall, is pretty nice.
North Carolina - Yee haw.
North Dakota - Roger Maris and that's all I know.
Ohio - One of the unluckiest states in the country with regards to sports. Mainly Cleveland.
Oklahoma - Commerce, OK was the hometown of Mickey Mantle. University of Oklahoma had a really racist fraternity.
Oregon - Washington's stoner little brother.
Pennsylvania - Philadelphia, Pittsburgh, and Amish land.
Rhode Island - I've only driven through it and don't know much about it.
South Carolina - Charleston is awesome.
South Dakota - I think Mount Rushmore is in this state.
Tennessee - Elvis and Steve McNair.
Texas - Dallas is all Urban Cowboy, Fort Worth is Mexican and Cowboy, Austin is like Texas's New York, and San Antonio has a lot of Mexicans.
Utah - Mormons and Julianne Hough. Skiing is big there, too.
Vermont - Burlington is awesome, apparently skiing is fun there but I've never been skiing anywhere so I can't comment.
Virginia - Uppity Redneck in parts.
Washington - Really rainy, Seattle is cool. Ken Griffey, Jr. is the only reason the Mariners are still around. Bring back the Sonics.
West Virginia - Take Me Home, Country Roads. Also, lots of coal and hillbillies.
Wisconsin - Cheeseheads.
Wyoming - Yellowstone and not much else.