I think it might simply be a matter of re framing the number of people and level of proximity in closeness the average person has in attendance at their birthday party. Also a good rule is, how many birthdays were you invited to. Also the pandemic created a lot of distance right. A lot of time between the last time you saw people so people feel less close. Maybe I would have invited my coworkers then but certainly wouldn't now.

Im more shy than anything. If I invited every person I knew before covid that was my age and friendly enough with that id actually want them at my birthday party I'd have maybe 15 people I could be certain would be happy to attend. Im sure I could invite all my coworkers that I get on great with at work but have never seen outside of it. But do I really want them there? Lol not really. I want to relax and have fun. I'd expect with scheduling issues a little over half might make it. I'd say a birthday part with 9 of my friends is perfect. I would expect that if I invited 80 more people I'd still only have 9 of my friends. Every girl I know would average about the same. People don't hate you at all. That's kinda what I'd imagine a regular birthday party to be. You'll have a great time :)