My Mom crying all the time and me and my siblings trying to cheer her up.
My Dad calling to say he'd be late to pick us up on Sunday, which became normal and most days we'd only spend 4 hours there and we played with our step siblings and never really saw him. Showing up and seeing all of our old furniture in his new place.
The ride home in the back seat with my siblings and being interrogated about my mother by him and his new wife.
Having to wear metal braces on my legs in grade school and having all the other children laugh at me and call me names. Being picked last for kickball forever after that even after the braces came off.
Telling the kids at school that Santa must be real because my mother would never have been able to afford the presents we got otherwise. Going to my Dad's the day after Christmas and seeing that their kids got the same presents we did from him plus a whole lot more.
Seeing my step brother's hand-made Star Wars Halloween costume after wearing a plastic mask with a bib on Halloween.
Going to the 6th grade dance and actually getting the nerve up to ask the girl I had a crush on to dance with me and her saying "yes". I ran home so fast that night - I felt like I was flying.
Getting up early in the morning every day to deliver newspapers and feeling proud of myself for having a job.
My Mom going to the hospital (she recovered) and having to live with my Dad and step mom. Calling my step mom "Mom" once and then running to the bathroom to cry.
My Dad saying he didn't want me to listen to "nigger music" and having my boombox taken away from me that I bought with my own money.
My step mom telling my step brother, "You don't want end up like kein-Roboter". Her telling me I had a big nose for no reason. Making me do all of my step brother's chores while I lived there, while he did none.
Getting bused to a black neighborhood to go to school. How scared I was when I one time I decided to ride my bike instead of taking the bus and was stopped on the way home by a group of black guys who wanted to steal my bike (or probably just fuck with me), because I somehow talked them out of by telling them that I worked hard and bought the bike with my own money and they'd have to beat me up to get it.
Having a black girl who sat behind me in homeroom play with my hair and not knowing what to do. I think she liked me, but her flirting was way too much for a 12 year old with the maturity of an 8 year old and with low self esteem on top of it.
Asking my older brother why he always used beat me up or lock me in a closet when we were little and him replying that he was bored.
Leaving home and getting a job and finally feeling free from all of the physical abuse from my brother and the mental abuse from my stepmom and father.