Throwaway because of the reasons.
I'm not coping.
The thought of not having him in my arms, not spending my life with him, makes me feel physically sick. I haven't spoke to him in ages now. I'm hurting. It's the hardest thing. I might bump into him again. I've told him he can see me whenever he likes. But he doesn't come. I need to kiss you again. I need you. Please need me back..
And every single minute without him just rips a bigger hole in my chest. I've been told to get over it. I can't. He became a part of me. I feel lost without that part.
I think it's okay that I'm not coping. I can't eat or sleep or do pretty much anything. Just wait.