A former friend peer pressured me into drinking to the point where I was extremely drunk and, uncharacteristically of me, I made out with a woman I didn’t know at the concert we attended. He didn’t like that. We tried to set him up with her friend. Hard no. He tried to ditch my intoxicated self, in a place I didn’t know, with a dead cell phone and a stranger. He relented and we Ubered back to my place, where his car was parked. When we got there I apologized for making him feel like a third wheel, and for me acting out of character and then things went off the rails.

He began to cry and became extremely upset saying tonight was supposed to be “our” night and only about “us.” Still slightly intoxicated and confused, I apologized for upsetting him and offered to take him for breakfast the following day where he could tell me how lousy of a friend I was over drinks and tacos. He said no. The next couple weeks at work we’re the worst weeks of my life that year. He was technically my superior and he made my life extremely uncomfortable, to the point I left because I felt physically ill every time I went into work.

He has since come out and appears to be in a happy relationship. I don’t speak to him anymore because I left a job I enjoyed because of him, and was isolated from a shared friend group as well. It hurts a bit still because I have been highly supportive of friends who have come out, and I thought he knew that. He was like a brother to me and still, he didn’t trust me enough to tell me after years of friendship. I get that it’s a hard thing to do, I just wish he would have been honest with me and himself before it cost us our friendship.