People who nearly quit playing after years of inactivity but started again, what's your story?

I played in a cover band where we were playing maybe 1-2 times/month for good amounts of money. We had 1-3 albums of original material that never really took off. We scored a couple of movies that the drummer made. I wanted something more than a cover band and probably more attention and was the typical "I know better than everyone". There were other tensions but I'm only mentioning what was my fault. We broke up somehow. The lead guitarist is the only one that sort of kept the lineage of the band going the whole time.

I was in and out of various experimental projects that did a lot of forgettable stuff. Although there was one instrumental funk band that was aggressive and also concise and minimalist in a way funk bands are not. My biggest regret is not having any recordings of this band. But we broke up because we didn't really have a market or any plan or whatever.

I recorded songs in my apartments for years trying to figure out how to write and sell music or something. It was always trying to figure out how to write that code for that lottery ticket into fame and money. But I was always working other jobs and recording and practicing became more of a hobby and then it turned into instrument collecting. I would play in team building work bands as guitar or bass or keyboard. One band had some good people and we played a show where we got a lot of applause, specifically something I did. I got obsessed with practicing and getting good again and had hours of songs ready to go. But I could never get the courage to perform solo or join a band. Plus it seems romantic until you are 30 and are like, ok if I do this what next? How much time to I realistically have to do this? Is there even a market?

Then I got depressed about music and sad about something. I think I was generally depressed but I just realized then that I was never going to "make it" and was never going even have the chance to consider "selling out".

Then I got into brewing and focused most of my attention on drinking pretending it was about the brewing hobby. After 8ish years I just threw everything out and quit drinking - mostly. That leaves a lot of time to fill up while I heal and a lot of nervous energy to get out as I sort through things in my head.

A few months ago, I found my 5 string yamaha in my parents basement that I hadn't played since at least 2009. It still had a battery in it, which I was always careful about removing. That means one day I put the bass in my case expecting to take it out soon and didn't touch it for years. Anyways, the case smelled the same and the bass felt familiar. Or great. Or I don't know, it filled something. It felt real, like yes you forgot about this but see your fingers still can destroy that fretboard and I can still play everything in aggressive octaves and still can do my fast runs, etc. I took it into a tech to get rid of some buzzing and to clean it up. The feeling of having it again is unreal. Like acceptance and resuming everything and some kind of deep down comfort.

I'm looking at middle age here so I know I'm never playing professionally again and I'm not going to stop my career to follow a passionate dream that makes sense for a teenager. I wanted that for so long but my break gave me a chance to reset and figure out what I want now. I just want to groove and have fun. Unplug when I want, plug in when I want. Eventually find some people to jam with, teach my kids how to jam with me and jam with them before I get arthritic and useless. No pressure about monetization, and no pressure about styles or even pressure to record or anything. However I'm a perfectionist with my sound so I'm concentrating on making each note have the shape and feeling I want it to have.

I also decided I'm bored with bass after so many years. I still have it but I mastered the level I want and I'm confident I can stand up with most players. So I bought a revstar 320 and some tube amp and I'm focusing on guitar because that feels more appropriate now. I think I'd like to play lead in a guitar for one show in my life before I become too old. I mean I'm already too old and it's already sad but it will only get worse so I have to get it out now.

Another weird anecdote is that I can't seem to restart my piano skills. Just kind of lingering in mediocrity and I don't see that getting better. So my bass skills are there and on fire still after some weeks of practicing and tuning up. And my guitar skills are building and that now feels right even though bass was my voice for decades - or at least 15-20 years.

I'm still trying to figure out where to take it all. I don't want to sing and play songs about falling in love or out of love or stuff like that. The monetary aspect is gone now too. So after the music break and after making a lot of giant mental whatevers lately, I'm back into it and trying to figure out how to use music to make sense of how I'm going forward in the world. It feels good because it is familiar and real and let's me get stuff out that maybe words kind of mask over.

So yeah just kind of saying this into space in a throw away to confirm where I'm at.

/r/Bass Thread