Thank you for your comment! So basically, my prompt is to tell about a personal event that has impacted me. I chose to speak about how I came to the US and how it shaped me. I ran it by my family and they told me that I MUST include a bunch of stuff so I really stand out. They keep telling me to just list facts and not to tell a story... I just feel that there is no flow, and I wont interest anyone.... Any feedback will help! I am very flexible and at this point willing to take out parts just to make it stronger

Here goes:

Tell us about a person or event that impacted/influenced your life.

Jimmy Ray Dean once said “I cannot change the direction of the wind, but I can adjust my sails to always reach my destination.” Some winds in my life created major storms, but my sails have always been adjusted for my goals.

In the last half decade, the common questions such as “where are you from?” or “can you say something in Hebrew or Russian?” ceased to exist; in most eyes, I became an American. But behind my Caucasian complexion and hidden accent, lies a story. This story consists of a choice beyond my control; because of this choice, I built a personal path which helped to prove my worth. I was brought to the United States at the age of nine. I could not grasp that this was my new home, but I still felt my winds beginning to violently blow. I felt different from everyone else and this made me feel uncomfortable; I wanted to be just like all the other kids. My fellow classmates easily noticed differences between them and myself; being bilingual with an accent, at the time, was enough to be casted as an anomaly. Even insignificant details of my day, such as seeing my peers and their parents, made me feel like a cultural mutt as I am an Israeli born to a 16 year old Jewish Soviet Union refugee mother while their family dynamics all seemed the same. Although I was always proud of my heritage, I continuously struggled to fit in and be accepted—the cultural gap between me and my peers left a void.

That first year was a difficult one. Learning the language, acclimating to a new environment, and maintaining grades felt as if I was juggling cinderblocks. During this erratic change, there was one consistency—swimming.

At the age of four, I made a decision to drop all my other sports and only focus on swimming; this decision turned into one of my longest lasting future commitments. Swimming was the sanctuary that helped me learn to adapt. Being in a pool with likeminded people helped me forget about my differences. Learning the language seemed easier because I began correlating the coach’s instruction with what my fellow teammates were doing. I worked tirelessly to adapt and feel like an American. With much effort, I slowly began acclimating and felt as though the United States was my new home. But to my surprise, the more I acclimated, the less I worried about fitting in. After this major hurdle, I began feeling more comfortable with my environment. I was much more confident with my personal background and felt my experience helped me learn to approach any task with a positive perspective. At the age of fourteen, I had another obstacle that again would try to make me feel different. I was diagnosed with Type 1 diabetes.

This new challenge began on a bad note, I had to be out of the water for six months. The idea of not swimming for such an extensive time devastated me. Although this was out of my control, I decided to use my past experience as a way to cope with this problem. The first three months were difficult. I was learning everything I can about my disease and worked on managing it. Alas, I had more bad news coming—diagnoses of epilepsy.

Now, I was forced to be out of the water for a total of nine months; at this point, I should have felt devastated. This situation was a flashback to my difficulties as a child. With that experience, I managed to cope with my new lifestyle and focus on using this as a motivation to work even harder when I was allowed to dive back into the pool. When I got back into the water, my determination was fueled. I had to adjust my swimming to my new lifestyle, but that did not stop me from achieving and persevering. By senior year, I was elected captain of the varsity team.

When it was time for college, I decided it was appropriate to slow down on swimming and wear the coaching shirt that I was offered. As a coach, I used my learned leadership and determination skills from my days as a captain. Running practices, my goal was to inspire kids to persevere and overcome any hard task I put in front of them. All these experiences flourished a passion to help my community. Due to the fact that I was brought into a new environment, I could sympathize with those who were foreign to their surroundings. My initial journey in the United States helped bring a new appreciation to diversity. Through my difficult times, I managed to focus more on athletic performance which helped build hard work and leadership.

As I progressed forward, my acquired personal experiences continued working as motivations for being a positive influence on my community. Hard work, dedication and leadership are characteristics that served as key drives for self-improvement. My gained appreciation for diversity shaped my journey.

As an immigrant with resident status, I have the constant reminder that me being in this country is a privilege. Every day was an opportunity to make a positive difference. Whereas many felt comfortable with their life in the United States, I woke up thankful and proved that I am more than just an immigrant—I am a goal oriented dreamer. With my personal journey, I proved that bringing me to the United States was the best decision that was out of my control.