I believe that there is a different facet to human attraction.

Absolutely.

I believe some people just wish to find a partner with physical attributes that they find appealing regardless of biological sex.

Then they can call themselves with whatever made up word genderists came up with for that orientation, for people who are attracted to only personalities and looks and not genitals. I'm sure that there is a word for that already! For a category of people who doesn't care about labels, you seem to be pretty fucking obsessed with them! Anyway, heterosexuality and homosexuality have nothing to do with what you are describing: their literal definition is about people who are attracted to people with either different genitals (hetero) or the same genitals (homo) as them. So if you don't care about genitals, you are not heterosexual or homosexual BY DEFINITION! It's not complicated!

I don't think anyone has a right to define someone else's sexuality.

It's not something out of morality, it's the literal definition of a term. I know you people like to think that words are meaningless and everything can mean everything: then why are you so obsessed with appropriating a word if that word has no real meaning to begin with?

Sexual orientation is about BIOLOGICAL SEX! That you don't like it because it's othering you is completely irrelevant. You can't change the meaning of a word on a whim and expect people to accept it so that you can be happy! If that word is meant to change its meaning, it will do it organically and with time, but forcing others to adapt is going to fail. People don't like being told what to do, what to say and, more importantly, what to think! The population doesn't give a crap about your feelings, and they are not going to twist their language and pretend to believe in something they do not believe in just because you say that they should! People in general don't care about what you do with yourself until you do something that infringes on their own rights or when you try to invade their community, and then start treating them as delusional and get aggressive and abusive when they tell you they don't buy your shit: no one gives a crap if you call yourself a lesbian as long as you don't force others to accept that and act accordingly (meaning that you can say you're a lesbian all you want, but a cis lesbian is not forced to treat you as such or to consider you part of their dating pool just because you claim you are). No one gives a crap as long as you don't try to make it illegal to tell you that you aren't, or to make it so that calling yourself a lesbian means that everyone else should be forced to acknowledge that, support that and welcome you with open arms in spaces and communities that do not want you. No! It's not the fact that you are calling yourself a lesbian that bothers people (even though that's pretty fucked-up too): it's the fact that you are forcing everyone else to accept it without questioning it or without being able to disagree with that! And also, this is just freaking hilarious to begin with: this is EXACTLY what your side is doing. YOU are trying to redefine people's sexuality, change the meaning of words so that it includes you in some ways even though there is NO rational, biological, scientific or social reason to do it besides the fact that you really really want to.

Are you ok with cis lesbians who only date cis lesbians and refuse categorically to date transbians at any point of their transition to call themselves lesbians? After all, you don't have the right to define their sexuality, right? So why is it that lesbians who feel that way are usually told to drop the lesbian label (because in your head a lesbian is a woman who dates other women even if those women were born with a penis, and not a female (only X chromosomes) who dates other females) and just admit that they are vagina fetishists? Why is it that trans activists have the right and totally should define those women's sexuality while those women can't define trans activists's or even their fucking own? Even though those women have a clear and cut definition of what a woman and a lesbian are and those definitions are the ones universally accepted in every kind of context besides trans activism and social justice?

Do you even see the kind of hypocrisy that you are throwing around? You can't do the thing we are doing... because we'd be sad! Because of reasons!