Then don't relapse? It's that simple and it starts with your own decision, relapsing is like punching yourself, you know you're hurting yourself and yet you keep moving? You said it gets worse, I know it may sound stupid or hard to believe, but if you really don't want to do it then you won't, whenever you feel the urges, do not say "just one last tme" because this could go forever, think of it this way, I see a fire and yet I touch it with my hand, ouch it's painful, yet I do that again and touch it with my hand, the longer you keep it, the worse it will be, Ouch now my hand is burned and I'm severely suffering, this is your case, you can change that because you control yourself.