We're family. We are honest. No emphasis on stepmom. No emphasis on step daughter. No pressure to display what anyone else wants to see based no their world view. We all show each other basic respect and kindness when we are around each other. We each get/got to know one another as individuals without conformity to roles and most of the stuff that causes hurt feelings and misunderstandings never actually comes up as an issue for us. The funny thing is that it's people around us who are like "no she is your mom!" "no she is your daughter!" while we are chilling like "It's okay. We genuinely like one another for who we are not what we are or how people see us". It's people who make assumptions that are most often wrong. We just deal with reality and a practical kind way. Very rarely does anyones get their feelings hurt and when they do because we have transparency in our family we talk it out and settle it quickly.