Is it possible to disagree with women on gender issues without 'invalidating their experiences'?

I can understand being frustrated and saying things that you wouldn't normally say, or even disagree with, to express a powerful feeling; not really making a point but just expressing frustration and/or looking for support.

But it seems to me that we do not treat all instances of this the same, do we? (To be clear I am being sincere, not sarcastic, when I ask this. I would like to understand)

If a person, for instance, had spent all day working in a low income area and became increasingly frustrated with the people there and how they acted, I personally wouldn't think it acceptable for that person to say "fuck poor people". If I knew that person but we were not friends, I would immediately be wary of associating with them; if they were a relatively close friend I think I'd honestly say something like, "Come on dude, you don't mean that. What happened?" I don't think I'd be able to let what they said slip by without at least somewhat acknowledging and disagreeing with it.

Similarly, I don't think if that person instead spent a day primarily around a particular race (independent of how those people acted) for them to say, "fuck [insert-race-here]," or "[insert-race-here] is [insert-stereotype-here]. Or if they encountered a series of people that acted entitled or were rude, who also happened to be primarily or all woman, I don't think it would be appropriate for them to say, "women are bitches," or "ugh women are entitled," or "fuck women" and I feel like I would try to be supportive but still call them on it. Is it okay to say that in frustration? I feel like I would be really uncomfortable around anyone that did say something like that. Is that weird?

I don't think I've actually been in a situation where a woman said, "fuck men" around me (though the race/class ones have), but if this theoretical event were to occur and it hurt me (even though I can tell they are venting), what do I do with that? Is my feeling invalid?

/r/AskFeminists Thread Parent