Possibly the worst robbery in history. I can't stop laughing

I did not translate this, I simply am copy and pasting the translation someone else did when this was posted another time.

Small Time Thugs = T

Cashier = C

T: Give the collection! (it's odd to me he used that specific word but meh..) -load fake gun- Empty the register I said!

C: What is that?

T: Empty the register! The collection! Empty the register!

C: What is "register" ?

-moment of silence-

T: Take out the money. Take out the money!

-stupid thug 2 take the fake gun and press the trigger..-

T: Are you stupid or what?

C: Wait.

T: The money! The collection.

-stupid thug takes the yellow can-

C: This is for *** mister. (I couldn't understand what he said but the thug forgot about it, maybe donation or something..)

T: The place where you put the money. Move! Faster.

-thug mumbles something-

T: Open this side where you put the money. Open. Throw 500 euro, 500 euros.

C: 5 ?

T: 500 EURO DO IT FAST!!!

C: Listen. Listen.

T: 500 Euro!

C: I'm not the boss.

T: I don't give a fuck who's the boss.

C: Listen mister, me not boss, me working here.

T: DO IT FAAAAAST! MOVE!

-thug at the door: break the glass-

C: Wait. 500 euro?

-thug fails to break the glass-

T: FASTER! Hey I'm not joking. 500 euro I said.

C: * I can't understand what he says but he's asking something to them *

T: I don't give a fuck find the register! Hey and the mobile phones, yeah the mobile phones. proceeds to start mentioning the mobile phones on the display like he's shopping at the mall

T: Yeah give the iPhones, give that one too. Fast! Fast! FAST! MOVE IT MAKE IT FAST!

C: Listen mister..

T: OPEN THIS! -tries to break glass display- Open it! Do it fast, open this. Open.

C: Because haha it's not me the boss I just work here.

T: I don't give a fuck open this, open this. Open. Open. Take the mobile phones out. TAKE THE MOBILE PHONES OUT. -tries to break display again- TAKE THE MOBILE PHONES OUT I SAID! Take the mobile phones out. All of them. TAKE THE MOBILE PHONES OUT I SAID!!! TAKE THEM OUT! I'M NOT JOKING!

C: Listen mister.

T: I don't give a fuck! Take them out, more! More! The white one! The white one! White! White! White! The white one! TAKE THE WHITE ONE OUT! The white one! -thug talking next to him: make it fast man-

T: Tablet! Tablet! Take the tablet out!

C: Mister. Mister. Mister. (with a terrible french) In fact he doesn't pay me really well because if I ... (talking about his boss)

T: I don't give a fuck make it fast.

T: Tablet! Tablet! TABLEEEET!!! Tablet -knock on the display- tablet tablet tablet. -looks at the main thug: hey man tell him to take the tablet ouuuut! come on-

T: Take out the tablet! THE TABLET I SAIIIID! Make it fast the tablet here the tablet the tablet the tablet.

C: You can take a soda can mister.

T: The tablet come on..

-other thug takes fake gun and hit the cashier with it-

T: The tablet. THE TABLET! The tablet. Give the tablet. The tablet, what else? What else? (shopping again apparently..) Yeah give us the Nokia Luma here, the Nokia. The Nokia Luma. THE NOKIA LUMA I SAID! Make it fast the Nokia Luma and the white phone here. This one, this one as well here. Both of them, both of them. And the white one. FASTER!!! I'M NOT JOKING! Come on, faster, faster.

-load fake gun-

T: FASTER OR I SHOOT!

-shoot the fake gun by mistake-

T: Faster. I'm not finished, the white one, the white one. The white one, I want the white one. THE WHITE ONE!!! I SAID THE WHITE ONE! ARE YOU DEAF?! GIVE! What else? Open, open.

-thug jumps over the counter-

C: Listen, mister.

T: The collection, the collection. Where is the collection?

T2: -mumble mumble I can't understand what he's saying-

T: Open! What else?

T2: The iPhone 4! The iPhone 4. No not this.

T: You sure?

T2: Yeah we don't give a fuck about this.

T: Ok.

T2: The collection! Where is the register? Where do you put the money?

C: What money? There is no money.

T2: He's lying.

T: Where is the register? The money.

T2: Go around.

C: I don't understand what you are saying.

T2: There. There. Go there.

T: Where is "there"?

C: The boss is *** (can't understand) call a cab. (wut?)

T2: Take the box.

T: Where? What box?

T2: There. Higher, higher. Higher on your left. There in the middle the white thing, higher, higher, there.

T: Hey we forgot some mobile phones! Nokia luma there. The boxes! The boxes! The boxes there! (apparently it's empty) Take this anyway. -gives it to the thug-

C: Mister listen.

T2: Come on let's bounce. Let's go away!

T3: Let's go away!

T: Take this take this.

T2: Let's bounce! Let's bounce! Take the gun take the gun.

T: Keep the gun keep the gun.

-cop is coming wondering what the fuck is going on there-

C: -pointing thugs and talking to the cop outside- Mister! Please! Please! Quick! Quick!

T2: FUUUUUUuUuuuuuck.

T3: Are we going to get arrested? (lmao hahahahaha)

T: Come on let's go out!

T3: I didn't do anything. -talks to cop- I didn't do anything.

C: Great. Great you just got caught red-handed.

Cop: Move there.

T3: I didn't do anything.

C: There, great. Great.

Cop: All the gang, sit down.

T: I didn't do anything.

C: Are you kidding me? -pointing the glass display-

Cop: Just lay down! Lay down!

Cop2: Hands on your head.

C: All the mobile phones! All the..

Cop: Ok ok.

C: He has a gun! -shows his waist-

Cop: He has a gun.

Cop2: PUT YOUR HANDS ON YOUR HEAD DON'T MOVE! DO NOT MOVE.

C: He has a gun! He has a gun!

Cop2: HE HAS A GUN?!?!

C: Yes!

Cop2: THIS ONE HERE!?!

C: Yes!

Cop2: HE HAS A GUN?

C: YES HE HAS A GUN!

Cop2: Who has a gun here? You? Do not move!

Cop3: Call central.

-cop2 makes the call-

C: He has a gun. He left it somewhere.

Cop: Show me your hands here. -talking to thugs- You hands over the head.

Cop2: Don't worry. Don't worry. Whoever moves I will break his skull. Nobody moves.

Cop3: Do you live in the area?

Cop2: Of course they live in the area. This one I know him.

Cop3: Him?

Cop2: Yeah him. Shh chill. Fine. Bring everything they took over there and put it here.

Cop3: If you move I will punch your fucking face. I'm sure it's one of you who broke into my car.

Cop2: There. Do not move. This is some great red-handed.

Cop3: Yeah this is some good red-handed here. It's great. One of the three guys has a hand gun you said? This one?

C: Gun yes!

Cop3: This one?

Cop2: Do not move.

Cop3: This one here in the middle.

Cop: Where is the gun?

Cop3: Wait we are going to search him, we are going to search him.

Cop2: Do not move. -talks to cashier- Take out everything they intended to steal here. There, put everything there.

C: -probably talking on the phone with his boss or something and talking in his native language-

Cop3: Great uncle! (it's a saying) It's your day.

Cop: Who has the gun? (I can't believe they are so cool about it)

Cop3: This one should have it he's the bigger one here because the other one look like baguettes. Should we take pictures?

Cop: No.

Cop3: No? -ask for position of a patrol-

Cop2: Small time thieves.

Cop3: But he said one of them has a gun. I hope for him it's a fake. It's fine, it's fine. Let's leave them do it in peace.

C: This one hit me!

Cop3: He hit you?

C: Yeah.

Cop3: You will have to file a report to the police station.

Cop2: (mode bad ass) Shhhhhhh.. (to the cashier, I think he wants the cashier to avoid saying too much in fear of reprisal) -whispers something to Cop3's ear.- It's cool. It's cool.

-comes the backup.. on bicycles (?!?!)-

Cop3: One of them is armed. But it's ok don't worry.

Woman cop: Oh you know it's ok no big deal. So what is this gentleman doing over there? (looking at the cashier)

Cop2: He was there, they tried to rob him.

C: I have the video. I have the video.

Cop2: What should we do? We lift them?

C: And they hit me.

Woman cop: Do they still have some weapons on them?

Cop2: Yes yes. Who has the gun here?

Cop: This is for the dogs. (lolwut?)

Cop3: Hey chief! Which one of them?

C: They had a gun.

Woman cop: Either they dumped the gun somewhere or..

Cop3: Show her the video.

Woman cop: They obviously put it somewhere. He really had a gun? (asking the cashier)

C: Yes a hand gun, a hand gun.

Woman cop: Yeah he's sure so either the dumped the gun or they have it on them. Maybe they threw it over there.

/r/videos Thread Link - youtu.be