Background: Mid 20s guy (24 +/- 1 year.. dont want to be exact and dox myself), born, brought up and educated in Ahmedabad, India. Worked hard throughout life and joined med school. Became a doctor after finishing MBBS, moved to the US.. i had a GC, founded 2 startups and make in excess of 1 Cr a month. I have never had a GF.. was too shy and probably didn't care about anything except working hard when I was in my teens and early twenties. I believe that I am a good human being at heart. I am as religious as i can be (not like extreme..but just regular religious Hindu Vaishnav/Jain mixed parents). I always wanted love. Was never able to find it on my own..perhaps because i never looked. I have voluntarily started finding and meeting prospects via my parents/family. If looks matter.. i was always thin before and had no dressing sense. 2 years ago I started working out, I have a great physique now. I have a 6 pack and lean 74 kg. I am 5 9 to 5 9 and a half kinda.. not perhaps like a movie star but those girls whom I open up to.. like my cousins.. tell me i am significantly above average in looks.. again not a movie star but not someone you would be repulsed with. (my cousins are brutally honest and were the reason i started working out in the first place)
Experience till now: I have met around 10 girls till now. I am looking for someone who is happy to be a homemaker, conservative, family-oriented, who will love me and care for me and I would do the same for her. Everyone wants a pretty spouse but i don't have any unrealistic expectations. Someone who looks decent enough for me to look at her and be able to smile is more than enough. I am not the kind who runs behind looks.. i am interested in an individual's personality more.
I have had very nasty experiences and have contemplated quitting the search altogether. Came back from the US a while back and have been meeting. Following are my experiences till now:
EXPERIENCE 1: I met the girl at CCD/Chocolate room/etc 7-8 times. It looked great on paper. She was very nice to me. Very pretty. Interesting personality. I liked her a lot. I was upfront in asking her on the last time we met about her past. We were quite comfortable at that time talking. I told her I had none. I told her I am OK with it if she had anything. I just wanted to know if she did.. and if she did have a past I said that I wanted to make sure she has moved on and is not hung over. I don't care about the past as long as she doesn't. Also asked her that I am personally not comfortable with my wife being in touch with her exes. As long as she is ready to start a new life I am alright. She said she had nothing in her past. Fast forward a week and we were going to be engaged. Info must have spread and somehow her ex must have found out. He called me..told me about it.. i didn't believe it...I was totally in relation mode and ready to be with her. Then i had perhaps the rudest shock i ever had. He sent me nude photos and videos of her and a link to a photo from 2 months on his FB. They were together. He was holding her waist. They seemed to be totally in love. I was shocked to my core. How can people be so dishonest ? He told me they had been together since 4 years. 4 YEARS !! My friends in her college asked their juniors. They confirmed. I confronted her and she said she had moved on but was shy of admitting it. How can you move on in a month (the time from the breakup till the time we first met). Later found out they were still in touch even after the supposed breakup. Reason for all this drama was she was in love/attracted to him but wanted a straightforward guy who was well settled as a husband. She had been in touch with him even after the last time we met before the engagement arrangements were under way. They had broken up..but kinda hadn't..it was complex. She intended on being in a relation with the guy as an extra marital affair (according to the guy). The guy was not OK with this and wanted her to marry him. He didn't really have much of a career from what i heard (supposed reason for girl's reluctance to marry him). I have no idea what kinda people are these. My family confronted hers..not too aggressively..but still..they were like.. yaar wtf ? You would have ruined our boy's life.
EXPERIENCE 2: Same meeting/greeting before deciding with another nice girl. After the same process I found out that the girl had a BF and was being forced by her parents to marry me. This time I was smarter, asked my friends to inquire in her college. Found out about the BF's name.. Confronted her..she confessed. I rejected via false excuse that personalities don't match as I didn't want her parents to be angry at her.
Aaj Kal ye kya ho gaya hai ? Getting admission in medical college and running a successful business is easier that finding a suitable match.. and I don't even have unrealistic expectations. Is it just that I had hard luck or is it just that most girls have found matches via love marriage these days ? Pretty much every girl has a past and the bad part is not the past but the refusal to move forward and the outright lies and deceit. I don't understand.. When i started this process I had high hopes. Doctor.. good family..earning more than the maximum I could have imagined myself doing 10 years ago... i also look good (i think).. I would have considered myself a good catch.. But i don't know what is happening.
Please could you pitch in your thoughts, advise, opinions.
Also, there were a few people i met in addition to these. Personalities didn't match and it didn't work out.
All of the above is 100% fact. None of it is exaggerated either negatively or positively. I just want honest answers. This account will probably be deleted in a few days once i get the answers. I am just too frustrated and don't have anyone to ask advise from so i turned to Reddit to get collective advise. I am just a regular guy..wants to find love.. and settle down. I am contemplating never marrying. I was lucky to find out these 2 times. Next time I may not be so lucky. I am kinda emotional and don't want my heart broken.