You can't consistently write epic songs and lose touch with the universal burden of being human.

this is so true. Well said too....

I'm really bored at work today and was up uber late last night. I feel like venting, please feel free to back slowly out of the room and run away at any point.

I learned how to be a decent person by copying rockstars, I only knew hatred and fear. This is how being a punk and my obsessive worship of a few select famous punk rockers, particularly Fat Mike, basically raised me to eventually be an ok person and to this day I kinda sorta think of him as a parent figure.

It seems kind of relevant here and as anyone who reads this crap will likely realise, I’m not big on paying for therapy no matter how much I need it :-p

I grew up with no real parental influences that made sense, my parents were not pleased with anything about me and I did not fit into their world right from the start. I latched onto rockstars for acceptance and an escape from my oppressive christian life, which if you're secretly queer and don't feel like you're entirely male comes with the certain knowledge that you'll be tortured for eternity by demons with no possible alternative or escape; eternity being a concept I have a far greater facility to comprehend than my parents. It’s a scary thing to try and rationalise as a small kid.

My parents eventually decided they were done trying to raise me and let me know it would be better if I was dead; after my third expulsion, blatant drug use, and early penchant for crime which they told me led to their divorce…. we parted ways. I was a bit too young to be out on my own (oooh woe is me! I know lol. To be fair though, Dad's a soldier and his first born is a feral transgender punk, it was still mean but I get it) Funny thing is that I was actually heaps tough, fighting was a way to assert myself as a man that I otherwise lacked and I did it a lot. I did ok out on my own.

As a young kid my love of punk and metal combined with my rapidly developing aptitude for guitar meant the scene took me in. I know it sounds tragically cliché but I get the same feeling listening to certain albums as what I imagine others get from going to their childhood home or the like.

I'm way past the dero years now and doin' well anyway, I'm not even that into Motley Crue anymore (though I seem to be wearing a crue jumper today now that I think of it). Nikki Sixx was my god and I did everything to be like him in my formative years which included picking up some really bad habits, I got to talk to him once years later and he laughed at me. Even when I made up parents they were mean!

NOFX managed to fill my aching (and sad, I know) need for role models as I moved into my more sensible adult years. I feel like I matured with my neurosis intact but it went from being 'self-destructive metalhead' centred to 'thoughtful punks trying to change the world' focused. The candy coated cynicism of Aaron Barrett and the Reel Big Fish was another one that has been a big part of my life for example, but nobody as much as NOFX. Other people call their parents for advice or comfort, I listen to NOFX albums. I'm listening to one now, they always make me smile :-)