The problem with defining rape in scenarios like this is that for rape, there is no grey area. It either is or isn't according to the definition. So when you have grey areas like this with alcohol, strangers, limited communication, it's hard to determine it.
Understand we also have sexual assault, and other legal terms, which I believe this fits more into.
What really stand out to me here is she kisses him goodnight and he starts getting a little rough. She even states she goes along with it. At this point, it's not rape, sexual assault, it's nothing. She then changes her mind, says stop and has to push him off her. It's unclear the timing between these actions, or if it was all once. I'd have to argue, if it was all at once, it's not rape or sexual assault. It's someone changing their mind in the act and coming to their senses they're in bed with a stranger.
However, if she says stop... he keeps going. That's where you get into the rape and sexual assault area. If more time passes, even seconds, he's still going and she has to physically push him off, then yes, by definition, it is rape and/or sexual assault.
But a few key things:
Girl takes random drunk guy home. Shady. Apparently let's him sleep in her bed, not even on the couch or floor, and kisses him. Just from a 'wtf are you doing' standpoint.... it's asking for trouble.
She's not wet and says stop. Personally as a dude, you should realize it's not go time at this point and back off. It's really easy to know when you're both into things and are role playing... this isn't role playing. Once voices were raised, he stopped. With alcohol involved on both sides, all communication is really out the window, but at least that got through.
So even if you agree it's rape, you then really have to get into the area of should this guy's entire life be destroyed over something like this? I'm not siding with any side here, but with very vague and constantly changing scenarios like this, I find it really hard to put the gavel totally down on this guy when both parties are drunk, she's kissing him and allowing him into her bed. Most of the world will just say yes, rape, jail for life and sex offender list. I really have to question specific scenarios like this......