r/AskNYC 21+ year olds, how did you make friends after moving to NYC?

Moved to NYC four years ago at 23, had one childhood friends here who I hadn’t seen in years. I told her I was moving to town and we clicked. She invited me to parties, where we got to hang out but I also got to practice socializing and forging my own path. I started going to every party I was invited to and met friends of friends.

I would also (and still do) reach out and text or Facebook message people to get coffee, go out for drinks or go to a museum together.

Another thing I do is I push myself to strike up a conversation if I feel that “oh she seems cool!” feeling. Just say something funny or compliment their shoes. Eg. was waiting in line at a sample sale and spoke to the girl in front of me about what we were looking for, past sample sales, how crazy we were for waiting in line, etc... we ended up shopping together and helping each other find what we were looking for! Now she’s one of my best friends and lives in the neighborhood over.

Don’t be afraid to reach out and smile. Everyone can be grumpy here (me) but making a connection is so important and natural. Everyone wants more friends! And if they don’t, no sweat. You tried :)

Take every invitation you get, don’t be afraid to introduce yourself, strike up a conversation and maybe even skip the small talk. Go straight to something funny or interesting you read/have been thinking about. People like that :) Maybe don’t ask the generic “What do you do?” question but “Are you working on any fun projects you’re excited about lately?”

Okay, long rambling comment over. Hope this was helpful. You’re not alone! Good luck!!

/r/AskNYC Thread