Here's the issue: Airpods Pro show up as either Airpods Pro Hands-Free AG Audio or Airpods Pro Stereo. If you want to use the mic, you have to use both "AG audio" for both mic and audio which sounds like garbage. If you want good quality audio, you have to use "Airpods Pro Stereo" but then the mic is disabled.

My simple goal is to have the same call quality as other devices.

My research shows it's Bluetooth's fault for being badly designed and not having enough bandwidth. Then how the hell do Macbooks, iPhones and Android phones have good call quality (both mic+audio) over bluetooth then?

Airpods support SBC and AAC. My BT is 5.1 part of the AX200 Intel WIFI+BT chip. Windows supports SBC and Apt X for BT connections. I don't think SBC is that bad at compression if "Airpods Pro Stereo" sounds perfectly fine. However when using the mic, I'm forced into the HFP of Bluetooth which sets my quality at "16 bit 1ch 8000Hz."

Has anyone, for the love of god, found a solution to this? Every god damn Youtube video just tells you how to disable the low quality headset mode and use them as headphones only.