I’ll try and make this coherent! Since my mom passed when I was 10 years old, my diet has always been quite bizarre. My father would only bring home one meal a day (typically fast food) and I think over the years my body had acclimated to this. At one point, I was even overweight! Since I began living on my own (moved out at 19), I’ve been able to manage what I eat just fine and my grocery cart is almost painfully and pretentiously clean. This was not problematic for me until I stopped working at a restaurant (one free calorie-dense meal a day, baby!) Pounds have been sloughing off and within 3 months I lost 15% of my body weight. I’m now teetering above underweight so I’m not quite worried yet but I understand that this is not sustainable. I used to have thick, full hair, and now I am incessantly shedding. I feel cloudy-headed all the time. And yet I still somehow can’t bring myself to eat more than one meal a day besides snacks. It’s completely foreign to me and I can no longer recognize my body’s hunger signals until I am dizzy, weak, and cramping. Even if I am at a weight I like now, I know that going on like this could kill me eventually. I understand it will make me hate myself. I think I also subconsciously learned that eating normal “quantities” (not quality!) will make me fat. I’ve been trying to at least consume whey protein shakes when I’m not finding myself able to eat to ideally help aide the hair and muscle-tone loss but I know it’s not enough. Does anyone have any tips or ideas on how to change this? I don’t want to hurt myself but I don’t want to start eating garbage again just to keep my body afloat. Anything would be helpful.