Depending on how emotionally healthy you are, any of these can be taken to an extreme, so it's possible that reasonable expectations can be twisted and fly out of control.

I agree, but I think the wording isn't the best because due to my PTSD, I'm technically not emotionally healthy, I get depressed, but I don't demand anything you wrote below:

Give/take compromise as a barter/currency within the relationship. If I do X, you need to do Y. Are the terms reasonable? "If I buy dinner tonight, you get it next week" = reasonable. "If we're dating, then you need to buy me dinner/gifts/spa days" = not reasonable.

I'd never do this.

For me, it's more like "Its my dads birthday, and I cant go out to the bar with you tonight, but drinks are on me next tuesday during our weekly pub trivia game"

OR (Usually)

"I'll cook if you wash the dishes, because you know I hate washing dishes and love cooking for you"

Open communication is healthy, unless it's stuff like "How many partners have you had!?", where there is clearly an answer one partner is wanting/needing. If the communication has an expected response or right/wrong answer, it's probably not healthy.

Im open sexually, so a question like that would never really bother me, but I have asked questions that depress me, and I hate when people try to counteract this.

I don't expect any one answer, Im open minded, I have just gotten upset when I've asked a question, and I get a politically-correct answer.

Honesty is honesty.

Keeping promises is important. Forcing people to make/keep promises or getting upset when stuff happens outside of your control isn't cool. "Promise me you won't masturbate while we're in a relationship!!!" = NO "You promised we'd have dinner tonight! I don't care if your parents died 10 minutes ago!" = NO

Ok, I have to stop you to say this: Your examples are too extreme.

My ex's parents would walk all over him, and it got to be so unhealthy for him that I had to speak to them and tell them that he freaks out every time he has to re-arrange his entire life, including work, to do what they wanted him to do with his free time.

If they said jump, he'd ask "how high?" and throw away all responsibility, and loyalty to anyone but his family.

Things like dinners, and spending quality time with each other matter to alot of people, and they matter to me. Why shouldn't a person be held accountable for not keeping a promise? Theres a choice in the matter.

If a person doesn't keep their promise that's on them, I just expect them not to make excuses.

Loyalty is to be expected, of course....but should your partner take your side even if he/she knows you're wrong? If your answer is yes, then you're doing it wrong.

Are we in public, or not? Are we riding on the subway, or eating at our own dinner table?

Seriously.

If I was in public with my guy, and he made some bullshit remark, I wouldn't make a scene and confront him, and embarrass both of us. I'd wait until we got home, and ask what his deal was. I'd give him a chance to defend himself, without onlookers judging him.

I expect nothing more, or less than that.

Setting people on paths where they have to pick a side is also not okay

Some paths can't be chosen. Sometimes you'll have to choose a side, and if that time comes, it's up to you to decide who's more important to you.

Chronic indecisiveness is also something that infuriates me , because it usually means that the person wants to spend the duration of their lives without responsibility (because if you never make decisions, nothing can ever be your fault)