i've tried to pursue my "art". acting. i've gotten further than most. but it's like winning the lotterly 5000 times over and over again just getting a SINGLE 1 line role on tv. that's how hard it is. and i've gotten close. but surviving in this world, whether it's a minimwage wage shitty restuarant job just for the flexibility to TRY and pursue acting on the side, or a full time job for a greedy multi million dollar company that's only paying you fucking 20 an hour. since when is 20 an hour good money?! for being 21, yes 20 an hour is decent. but jesus christ 40k a year is NOT ENOUGH MONEY TO LIVE ON even if you're in bumblefuck arkansas or some shit, let alone any kind of city with market priced rent. this is what i'm talking about. i've tried harder than most people would to pursue what I thought I was put on this earth to do, but the evilness and greediness of others have oppressed me to the point where I don't even want to fucking live on this planet WITH these people, because they are such disgusting grotesque monsters. there is no answer here. i'll explore real estate, luxury auto sales, and either achieve my acting dream or kill myself before i turn 40, because i absolutely refuse to AGE as a corporate slave to some rich fucking sociopath. i would rather die.