Ready to end it

Hang in there my friend. I'm 61 years old, had a heart attack 2 years ago, my hands shake because of essential tremors, I have 24/7 tinnitus, constantly looking around to see if a fucking train is coming and the cherry on top of the cake was when my wife of 30 years kicked me out of our house with no job and no money.

I found an apt and been living alone since May. I cried my fucking eyes out, and now I'm more dry than the Sahara dessert. I got no more fucking tears for her. For 2 months I was kneeling in front of my dead father's and Mother's pictures asking them to take me. But as time went by, I, who have literally nothing still managed to smile and say fuck her!!!!!!!

She's not even worth thinking about. I have to move forward, Idk know where to , but still I want to be around to see how things play out with my fucked up life. So I decided to shed her off my mind and life, like a snake sheds its skin. If I can do it anybody can!

Stick around it's going to get better,I promise you,it does! Try to find a little humor in all of this and you'll see it's not worth taking your life because some asshole decided to be the author of your worth. I say Fuck em!c If they don't want us once we don't want them a 1000 times.

PS I haven't had sex with her since 2008. And NO I'm not bullshitting you.

/r/DeadBedrooms Thread