I totally understand. I'm not sure what your beliefs are regarding God/Religion/Spirituality, but I will tell you this... We all have souls powering our bodies. 1- It is scientifically proven 2- Death is a horrible thing, which will happen to all of us someday. Souls never die, but bodies do. That being said... Trying to live as much as possible to do good, like myself, will give you a fulfilling life. What I'm trying to say is, when I'm dying, I want to die knowing I did good for the others, and your self worth is worth more than you think. BUT... Have you tried your hardest? That's the question... Committing suicide will make everything worse. I've been there (thought about it at least), and every time I tried to, my cat peanut would walk in my room and meow at me for treats or food. THAT right there, showed me that even a simple furry creature has a drive to survive, to eat food, to say hi to people, to make you feel needed. From that moment on, this thought came to my mind: "If a cat who spends his days trotting around my backyard grass catching butterflies and mice just to make himself happy still comes to ME to have me provide him dry food/wetfood, what is it that I need that will get me acknowledged too?" (Sorry if that was too deep) ...but I hope you catch my drift. The simplest forms of life have a drive to live, and you are far superior to a cat or a dog. How many animals do you see or hear about committing suicide? None. Think about that. We all try to live as long as possible. You are a strong person, think about all those times you told a friend or a family member to "stop bugging you" or you told someone to "F off", because you stood up for yourself, no matter what the outcome. You didn't care what they thought. That my friend, is your inner drive to prove you are here to coexist in anyway, and live the best life you ever can like the rest of us.