Really kind of hating my daughter's stepmom right now

I'm really not, but thank you for your input. Stepmom knows I can and would happily be able to buy my daughter a new swimsuit. One of the contentious points between my ex and I is the discrepancy in finances. I am concerned that they cannot provide for her materially as well as my partner and I can. Because he was in arrears for child support (nearly $6000) I am not required to pay child support until mid-2016, per our revised custody and child support agreement. I know how expensive teenage girls are. I do not think they are prepared for this, and I offered to pay child support right off the bat to even things out. My ex declined. I have been checking in with her to make sure she has the clothes, shoes, ect. that she needs, and have been shopping for her accordingly.

My main issue is with the leg-shaving. I think it's rude and invasive and unnecessary for them to force her to do that. We go to a combo water/amusement park nearly every weekend, and no one freaking cares what anyone else looks like because they are having fun on water slides/roller coasters. I also do feel, in a way, like stepmom was trying to make her wear this ugly threadbare swimsuit as punishment for not organizing her drawers.

It's true that we are more lax about organizing her room at our house. I don't see a point in fighting every day about where her socks are. I'd rather have harmony. She's been a child of divorce since age 4, she is well aware of mom's house/mom's rules and dad's house/dad's rules. I think the switch from dad being a weekend parent to dad enforcing stepmom's rules is really a big adjustment. I hope that we can all talk about it in therapy soon, together. It's amazing what my daughter will be scared to say out loud but will be so bold about in therapy. :)

/r/stepparents Thread Parent