I've heard plenty of controversy surrounding Nightwing #93, but this is the first time I've heard about her laughing about it.

For the record Ms. Grayson stated that it was "not consensual" several times, but she never said that it wasn't rape. I'd recommend this analysis for an attempt to understand what she was trying (and apparently failed) to do:

In August 2004, as that narrative was still unfolding, Devin Grayson sat for this interview. Like any good storyteller being paid to maintain suspense, she didn’t give away the ending to the arc. And part of that ending was Dick coming to terms with what had happened to him, identifying himself as a victim rather than someone to be blamed.

As a result, Devin Grayson resisted explaining what to make of that scene with Tarantula, writing, “For the record, I’ve never used the word ‘rape,’ I just said it was nonconsensual (I know, aren’t writers frustrating? smiles).” But she practically begged readers to stay tuned for the story’s resolution:

I think if you read through issue 100, you’ll see some of the response you’ve been waiting for. . . . The nature of stories is to set up and resolve conflict. We’re just not at the resolution stage with this story yet, and I apologize if it’s taking too long. . . . I really wish we could have this discussion after issue 100, because then I could see if you felt that any of your questions were answered in the normal course of the story, which is of course always the goal. This is meant to be a story about heroism and identity – how do we respond heroically (if that’s our default or aspired-to setting) when we lose all indication of our heroic identity?

As I read those comments, Nightwing’s realization that he’d been raped was a crucial part of the narrative. Though that was part of Devin Grayson’s story all along, she didn’t want to reveal that resolution prematurely in an interview; her coy language kept the question alive for readers. Many of those readers reacted angrily to the suspense and the language, accusing her of fogging the difference between “nonconsensual” sex and rape when her real point may have been that there’s no difference.

Obviously that entire story was mishandled, and Ms. Grayson shouldn't have even touched upon such a sensitive subject unless everybody involved was 100% sure she would handle it correctly (her editors probably should have said no to the Nightwing: Born Again plot as a whole and definitely should have said no to rape being a subplot in it), but the fandom has taken her comments out context, probably misinterpreted them, and demonized her for it in a way that really disturbs me.