I created a throwaway for obvious reasons. You wanted a serious and honest response, so this is how I can do it.

I've been a cheater in most relationships I've had, and as a result, a self-hater for most relationships. I've been through therapy for about 8 years for other reasons and what I've come to learn is that I didn't feel I deserved love, affection, or appreciation. This stems from a whole host of other things from my childhood (sexual abuse, lack of fatherly relationship, latchkey kid, etc).

I treated relationships as though they were temporary even though they lasted for years. I'm a good looking guy so lots of women offer up temptation that I found difficult to reject. And each time, I hated myself for my indiscretions. I also picked relationships that were bad for me--cheater girlfriends, terrible communicators, insecure women, etc.

Then I met the girl of my dreams. I was so into her from day one that I immediately shut down all of my other options. I told other women I was dating that I was happy and done dating around. I shut down a non-committed long-distance relationship as well. I was really, really in love. Then I found out she was cheating on me. I can't describe the heartbreak and betrayal I felt. This sent me into a downward spiral of emotional hell. Through therapy, I was able to get back on track, appreciate myself more, and find a girl who is absolutely perfect for me. I do still feel urges to cheat sometimes, but my unwillingness to hurt her saves me. Part of my self-hatred stems from not doing the right thing. Each time I do the right thing, I feel a sense of pride, and it makes me feel worthy of the love I receive. A positive cycle.

Edit: Um, wow, I didn't expect for my response to be up top. I will answer questions as much as I can but it may take me a while.

Edit #2: Whoever gilded me, thank you. That was very kind of you.