There are a lot of warped opinions on alcohol use and sobriety. "You can moderate" is such a shitty thing to hear when we know we can't. People insist on saying it, I've heard it from a bunch of people including my mother. The only thing I know how to do is ignore them.

A warped opinion of sobriety, one often based not in sober communities, is that getting sober is like waving a magic wand that makes everything better. With most of us there are some underlying things that drove us to drink in the first place. Alcohol exacerbates them. But they're still there when we get sober. We're better able to deal with them, but we still have to deal with them, and if we expect everything to get better it can be a shock when they don't, and can drive us towards a relapse. For me it's reminding myself that everything doesn't get better when I'm sober, but it's at least better than when I'm drinking.

That's my take on it, anyway. Wishing you strength and happiness