Relationship With Your Mother

Yeah, my (feminist) mother tried to defend male circ. to me; ironic since it is not really practised in the UK, she knows next to nothing about it, and I was subjected to graphic descriptions of FGM when I was young (part of my feminist indoctrinated upbringing).

I was told all sorts of mythical bullshit such as that 'history' comes from 'his', 'woman' is derived from 'man' (it isn't), men like women to wear heels so that they can't run away, men like women to wear long gloves and stockings so that it looks like they haev no arms or legs, all men are potential rapists, (she told me that she had been raped, which was obviously traumatic for me to hear), men are inherently warlike and destructive and will destroy the world with nuclear warfare if womyn don't stop them (this was in the '80s during the cold war), I was also brought up to believe in a lot of horseshit like astrology and homeopathy, allowed and encouraged to wear makeup, nail varnish and dresses, she also told me how she had been called a whore and slut after she got pregant with me at 18. Never met my dad by the way, in fact it turns out she wasn't even correct about who he was (I tracked my alleged father down and asked for a DNA test, which came back negative). In fact she told me a long list of about a dozen or more guys she has slept with until finally getting pregant. She hit me several times when I was a teen and apparently beat me when I cried as a baby.

Some 'highlights' of my life with her:

  • She decided to go to art college when I was 16, uprooting the family, cutting short my education, and I basically jumped at the chance to move out and get away from her since there was such a bad atmosphere at home. Worst decision of my life, with hindsight.
  • Refused to cook meals for quite a while when I was a teen, as she went 'on strike', taking to bed with depression for weeks at a time, leaving me to fend for myself.
  • Had to move back into home due to money problems, but she threw me out, leaving me homeless.
  • Introduced her to a friend of mine, we all had a lot to drink and unbeknowst to me they went to bed together. They are still together after ~20 years.
  • Exposed herself to me twice, flashing her underwear and running into the room naked for a 'prank'.
  • Cancelled an arrangement I had made with someone else because she didn't think it was the right thing for me to do, or something.
  • Made inappropriate comments to me such as 'your arse looks good in those trousers' and 'you're well hung', then tried to turn it back round on me when I complained.
  • Used to dump her bloody period pants in the bathroom sink.
  • Still has extreme bouts of rage including screaming and swearing very louldy and agresssively when she loses her temper (I have to just hold the 'phone away from ear, and have had to ask her to stop swearing in public before).

I still can't get on with her really. Apart from anything else she it totally unable to understand my POV on things, and often tries to 'correct' me, and is just not really able to listen, constantly chipping in and offering her 'insights' and attempts to console / comfort when they are not being sought at all. It's best just to keep my distance and not talk to her about anything too personal. It's the only way IMO, you just have to distance yourself and be as independent as possible.

/r/MensRights Thread