"Piano Man"

It's nine o'clock on a Saturday

The regular bros shuffle in

There's an old man sitting next to me

Making love to his dumbells and weights

He says, "Son can you spot me a few sets

I'm not really sure how it goes

But it's thick and it's tight

And I lifted it all

When I wore a younger man's ^{compression shorts} ."

Show us a curl you're the piano man

Show us a curl tonight

Well we're all in the mood for a few gains

And you've got us feeling quite pumped

Now John at the rack is a friend of mine

He gets me my plates for free

And he's quick with a joke or to give up some talc

But there's someplace that he'd rather be

He says, "Rich, I believe this is killing me."

As a smile ran away from his face

"Well, I'm sure that I could be Mr. Olympia

If I could get some of your tren."

Now Paul is a real estate rentalist

Who never had time for a squat

And he's talking with Davy, who's still benching two plates

And probably will be for life

And the waitress is talkin' on the elliptic

As the businessmen slowly get ripped

Yes they're sharing a shake they call loneliness

But it's better than lifting alone

Show us a curl you're the piano man

Show us a curl tonight

Well we're all in the mood for a few gains

And you've got us feeling quite pumped

It's a pretty good crowd for a Saturday

And the manager gives me a smile

'Cause he knows that it's me they've been coming to see

To forget about life for a while

And the grunts they sound like a carnival

And my shake smells like double chocolate

And they lift the bar and I put the dog in my car

And say, "Man what are you doing here?"

Show us a curl you're the piano man

Show us a curl tonight

Well we're all in the mood for a few gains

And you've got us feeling quite pumped