rolling for the first time?

hopefully this is still relevant

This is from someone, who has done MDMA for the first time on NYE. Well, technically not for the first time, but the first experience was half a pill and I didn't really feel it. The next time I took ~140mg with a 60mg booster and holy shit, words can't even do the justice. I mean, how could they, since they were invented by sober people to describe sober situations. You can talk about euphoria, hapiness, but you just have to experience it, trust me. I was a bit pissed at my friend, because he has done it before and wasn't able to talk about it (so I thought the reason was becouse he is a big damn pot head, but oh boy, was I wrong).

I dropped. Then, I was a bit anxiously checking the time every 5-10 mins. At like 30 mins in I could feel something. It felt like something's pressuring me from the inside, but not in a way you experience pressure from exhaustion or whatever. I also had this sensation of narrowed vision. This feeling along with the pressure (maybe this is called body load, I haven't done any psychedelic apart from MDMA, so I can't tell for sure) were gradually intensifying and I kept reminding myself that this is the hardest part and I will soon be on the other side. I was also sweating profusely.

Then, mind you the shift from base line to I'm ROLLING BALLS was really smooth, I got really empathetic and somewhat enthusiastic about everything. My homies seemed like the best creations ever existed, which they are.

Everything seemed to be in it's place. I was also thinking about the relationship with my father. He's that 'no pain, no remorse' kind of guy and I just didn't understand how can he be so close-minded and hard on me. Then, I came to a realization, if I ever want to be someone, I have to do something for it, whether it's comfortable or not. It was shown to me in a way that I haven't felt before. Dad was teaching me to step out of my comfort zone and I just couldn't come through (who's close-minded now, eh). I realized that all his acts were commited with pure love. Anyway, this another story for another time. Back to the roll.

We were talking about our past, our plans, and also depression. I felt like I can get everything off my chest so easily. I can honestly say I was experiencing catharsis. Every emotion was pure and intense. And it was so fucking beautiful. They wanted to know my perspective and I wanted to know theirs. Imagine like the two basic human needs; food and drink. Now, your friends become the third. It's so hard to explain, yet so simple. But hey, this is a metaphor I came up with. We went really deep into every single topic. The music sounded amazing.

Unfortunately, the time goes so fast on MDMA and I can't recall everything from that wonderful night, but that's probably becouse of too many joints smoked.

10/10, definitely would do again.

/r/MDMA Thread