If you can't train, discipline, and care for your dog, perhaps you should look into hamster ownership or something a little less interactive?

I spend all of my time with my dog either sitting right here doing jack-shit-nothing, or we're in the woods. He does what he wants, and stays with me at all times, and occasionally finds truffles for me if I'm feeling like working.

You can't imagine a situation when you'd want him to be unleashed outside of a fenced area like a dog park. And you can't imagine a place where your dog would either not chase something uncontrollably, or be chased by something else... so I suggested a forest.

I guess you are being obstinate for shits and giggles, but if your dog is not disciplined it will chase anything. In a park, in your yard, in the street, in the forest. At least in the forest you can not be arrested for allowing your dog to run free, and in the forest no random aggressive dogs are going to chase or confront you or your dog.

You haven't been to too many forests tbh. We live in a gigantic forest. But humans and dogs and cars scare the ever-living shit out of fauna.

Hey look. I was being funny and making a light-hearted comment, but your shitty response made me legitimately angry.

All the problems associated with having a dog off leash are gone in the woods. Unless your dog is untrained and just runs away from you ... which might be a personal problem...