You will get through this for your children's sake. Vow to yourself to never let it get that heated again, especially in front of your children.

My friend was falsely arrested for domestic violence and spent 1 night in jail. The conditions she went through scared me. They took her clothes and hair thing. So she was wearing scrubs, no bra, no hair tie, they didn't give her meds, and she was on her period, they didn't give her a pad or tampon. So the next morning in front of the judge, she looked crazy, hadn't slept, etc. I recently was in a car accident that was not my fault and I felt nervous to call the police on my behalf because of what my friend went through. I was upset and the cop wrote stuff I didn't say in the report. Btw, she and I are both white women in America.

All of this to say, you couldn't have known what would happen calling police. I believe you wanted to settle the situation, and you wanted help, not handcuffs. I believe the best thing you can do for her would be testify on her behalf. Emotions were high, she shoved you, you didn't mean to say assault. You really just wanted to calm the situation, and the charges should be dismissed. Maybe get her a lawyer.