Brother, I believe, it is a good sign that you realized that you cannot find satisfactions anywhere else but in God. I have been went through that situation and it is definitely not fun.

My sincere advice would be, observe yourself and ask yourself and ponder for a while (writing on a journal will be very helpful) why do you behave and feel in a certain way. In your context will be, why do You feel guilty? I would ask, are your behaviors and thoughts driven by the desire to be in relationship or by God and His Word?

Whenever you ponder, pray that the Holy Spirit to reveal where your treasure is, in other words, what your heart truly desires and why. Our heart is very complex and we can’t do this on our own at all. But God by His grace, He reveals it and brings us back to Him

I’m not saying that desiring to be in relationship is not wrong or sinful at all, for it is not good for a man to be alone as God said. But if it becomes more important than God and controls your behavior and thought, it is idolatry.

(If there is anything y’all want to add or to correct, y’all are welcome to do so!)