SCREAMING on the inside (vent)

I asked for my husband's help. He told me to send this message, so I did: "[my husband] says we can't hang out anymore and we're going to do couples counseling because the me having single friends isn't good for the marriage. But I did appreciate all the times we hung out."

I know it's fucked up to lie and send break up messages, but I just want to be done with it. Also, in the 24 hrs prior he had sent me about 8 text messages, told me he loved me twice (and that he was going to kill himself) and called begging me to call him. (this is just in one day!)

To my message he replied: "Well can I have my coat I left there back? And one last hug? I am super depressed now. It was expensive. And I'm sure I have some more stuff there too. Thank u that would be great"

He thanked me for saying yes before I even said anything! It's that kind of stuff that's his M.O. He assumes I'll say "yes". Like I have "natural born pushover" written on my forehead. Also!!! He didn't even say anything about giving 2 shits about my relationship with my husband.

And as far as any prior trying to set boundaries.... it was impossible! Even if I set them, stuck with them, AND said "NO" .... The second I set one boundary, even IF he completely obeyed the boundary....he'd figure out 10 other ways to be terrible....for example: "Don't steal my weed" became "Stop asking me for money".... and "No I won't suck your dick" became "Can you stop hugging me every 5 minutes?" .... and every "no" just got met with 20 more questions... in rapid succession.... as a means to probably confuse me and make me at least say "yes" to SOMETHING. Manipulation!!!!! GRRRRR!!!

I hope this is the end of it. The thing that got me the most was the guilt voice in my head "Oh How could you, getting rid of a friend... he doesn't mean to be the way he is....how dare you be so rude ..."

fucking guilt....shut upppppppppp!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

/r/Codependency Thread Parent