Last winter ex I was trying to innocently crawl into my tent. As miserable as one can be. In freezing rain with not many clothes on, knowing he has to be up in a couple hours.

I'm contemplating my life. It blows donkey dick don't it? Who the hell chooses to do this?

My thoughts are suddenly shattered by a flying thermonuclear Coleman stove and its apparatus. As I was trying to crawl in, someone was trying to light a stove... In the tent. It went poorly.

So I was smacked in the kisser by a hastily sauced up heater gone wrong. It had literally melted down and begun exploding inside the cloth tent.

Happily the mcpl came along noticing this madness... And heaped praise on the raging dipfucks who lit it in the tent, for their quick thinking throwing it back out. Nobody mentioned that I took a stove to the gob.

This was but a footnote, in what turned into the worst night of my life so far, as freezing rain froze into -20 that night lol.