I'll reply to the rest later. I just have to address this first because it's distracting me too much: "There is no "much more traumatic background,"

Of course there is. And I think the idea that we can't compare different difficult experiences is unhealthy and flawed. For one thing I do think in many instances it's healthy for people to realize other people have it worse. It adds perspective to your own life and also understanding of other people's lives. Once we realize some people have gone through things that's hard for us even to imagine, we tread lighter through the world. And people do sometimes just need a reality check as well. If your three week high school relationship ended or you failed an exam, it will hurt. But you should realize that big picture these are trivial problems.

And if we call everything trauma, the word loses all meaning. When defining PTSD psychologists use the definition "experienced threat to your own life or someone close to you..." to define trauma powerful enough to cause the changes to the brain that is PTSD. It's part of the diagnostic criteria. Sexual assault and childhood abuse are also included. PTSD does change people's reactions a lot and is just different from people being a bit sad about something.

Everyone experiences struggles and hurt through life. But not everyone experiences something genuinely traumatic. Which is a good thing. And I think it's perfectly ok to say that some things are objectively harder than others, and that some things don't qualify as trauma, but are just an expected part of everyday life.

Being raped or losing a loved one in an armed burglary is objectivly worse than going through a breakup or being ghosted by a friend. Even if the later things also are very painful for people. I just feel that if we are real about these things we all know that is the truth.