But not a single man I've ever been with has apparently ever wanted me for ME. And that's really crushing.

I was trying to foster a deeper connection with my guy, so I bought like a relationship questions game kind of thing as a "share gift" for us for Christmas - our first. (This was totally separate from his actual gift, btw). I'm his first gf, and the relationship to that point had been so superficial because he wasn't asking questions about me. Nothing about my experiences in life, likes/dislikes, opinions, etc. Nothing. He would pick up info if I announced it, he was good about that, but it was becoming pretty clear that he had no sense of how to create depth in a relationship.

So anyway, he's not thrilled lol but begrudgingly agrees to play. We're going along and we get to a question, "what do you love about your SO?". It's my turn so I start talking about how I love the way he thinks, how he always seems to see people in a good light and is kind, I love how he pursues knowledge, etc. It's his turn and he is just kind of blank and uncomfortable and then he says, "you're always happy to see me when I come home." Pause. "And boobs."

Like wtf. I pressed him a little bit and he added, "I like how you make me feel about myself." So like literally everything this guy likes about me, is about him. I'm not a person to him. He doesn't question me about my life and my thoughts because I'm a prop in his life, not a person with feelings.

We've talked about it since then and he makes more effort to ask about me, but the reality is that it's forced. It hasn't changed anything about how he sees me as a person. So yeah. That's that I guess.