[Serious] Parents of unsuccessful young adults (20s/30s) who still live at home, unemployed/NEET, no social/romantic life etc., do you feel disappointed or failed as a parent? How do you cope? What are your long term plans?

I'm a few years older than you (36) and I also feel like a failure at times. It seems near constant lately. But there is a difference between FEELING like a failure and BEING a failure. I had a job for over ten years and now I don't. I could try and get one but I'm fortunate enough to not need to right now. I'm terrified that complacency is an excuse to cover my other fear of failure. I feel angry a lot, but it seems like not enough to change.

This doesn't make me a failure. The times I fail is when I stop trying. I am still trying, and I'm confident I'll dig out. And you will too.

We may feel like we are sad or worthless or a failure, but a feeling is not the same as being. These feelings, despite their duration, are not permanent.

Your potential is not gone. Look at any of the late in life success stories. Having things figured out in not an end state, it is transition phase until we are upended again and we put ourselves back together. Stronger. More capable. With kickass stories, cool scars and with new and old people who mean a lot to us.

There is no blueprint to life. No set age to achieve. Sometimes we need space and perspective to find our way. It sounds like you are trying, and as long as you keep moving forward you can blaze a trail even if you don't find "the path". From one struggling in the woods right now, I wish you the best in your journey.

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