soz for long post
Child sexual abuse and a pretty bad eating disorder through high school that still lingers around (I'm 24 now). I had to put a lot of emotional work into dissociating what happened to me from my own sense of self. I don't really feel m/any negative feelings about what has happened to me other than it's just unfortunate, sometimes it makes me sad an it does affect my ability to trust people/be vulnerable but I'm dealing, and it's no reflection on my value as a person. I think this has made me quite accepting and understanding because I will not be shocked or disgusted about something someone is going through because I know it does not define them and I'll always hear ya out.
The eating disorder was pretty cooked, I had to consistently choose to live when I felt like there was no reason to/I didn't deserve to (long story, I was overweight as a kid and my mum forced me to exercise or I wouldn't get food. Absolutely no shock to me that I developed AN. I feel a bit resentful about it, but I don't blame her). I'm still working on trying to 'give up' the eating disorder because, in contradiction to what I said above, it still feels like a very strong part of me even though I know it's just destruction.
I had an emotionally abusive housemate (whom I loved dearly) for a year which was quite terrible. About 6 months in to living with him he attempted suicide, I found him and took him to the hospital and the emotional abuse got much worse quite quickly. I relapsed into my ED, developed quite bad anxiety which I had never experienced before and became addicted to valium. With the help of a psychologist I realised (and could act on this realisation) I am not responsible for other peoples' emotions and anyone who expects that from other people is unreasonable.
More than anything, thinking about it now, I don't think I've been made stronger by the above, but that I got through all this crap, I've lived out of home supporting myself for 7 years, I'm in a happy, healthy relationship and I'm in grad school has made me realise that I am strong when I've never felt or thought that about myself before.
Also if any internet-stranger is going through some shit my inbox is always open, replies might be slow but this is a sincere offer.