[Serious] Redditors who are no longer in contact with their parents, what was the final straw?

I'm no longer in contact with my father. He lives 2 minutes away by car from my home and literally across the road from my workplace. Sorry, my storytelling skills aren't the best.

When I was thirteen, I was told by my mother that she and my father were splitting up and that he had a girlfriend. I didn't quite understand at the time, but a couple of years later it hit me that she was telling me and my brothers that he cheated on her. She told us that he had told her that he hadn't loved her for 10 years (my little brother was 10 years old at the time.. low blow for him) and that he had no interest in a family anymore. I'd never seen my mum cry that hard before in my life. I hugged her for the first time since I was a small child (we aren't a very physically affectionate family). For the next two years after that, I had very on and off contact with my father. Sometimes my brothers and I would stay for him for a week or two, sometimes we wouldn't see him for a month. He would call us and have 2-3 minute chats with each of us about school and that was it. That stopped after 3 months. We occasionally got invited out for dinner with him and his girlfriends (they changed every six months or so) and one time he took us down to Melbourne (we live in Canberra, Australia) to stay with one of them for a week. The entire time, I just took trains around everywhere because I didn't care about them and I hated being there. I felt like I was betraying my mum when I stayed with my father. When I turned fifteen, my dad got a new girlfriend who was an absolute nightmare. My dad has narcissistic personality disorder, which makes it hard for him to read people's emotions and figure out how they feel. He gets very apathetic unless it's very obvious what the person is saying. His new girlfriend is a very loud, emotional human being who is very selfish and has borderline personality disorder. Basically, the perfect match in Hell. My father stopped making contact with my mother and us children, the child support payments started falling away and he would pay very late. This made life very hard on us because my mum doesn't earn very much and can't until she gets her nursing qualifications (which she doesn't have because of him, but that's another story) and gets a proper job. My father stopped attending my little brother's sporting games and my sporting games as well. Almost all contact was dropped. Often I would try to reach out and would only get my texts answered by the girlfriend, calling me nasty abusive names and generally being a cow. She often made comments about how I was going to drop out of school and become a teen mum and have my child taken away. She said my little brother would be an obese, jobless 40 year old virgin who still lived with his mother and that my older brother would be a dole bludger (basically somebody who lives off government unemployment benefits). She called my mother some horrible names too, I don't even want to get into them they're just terrible. I later found out that she didn't let my father do anything outside of work and that she was physically abusing him as well. A year later, they broke up and I decided to reach out to my father again. I contacted him and asked him if I could live with him part time. He said yes and I stayed with him for two weeks per month. It went really great, until one day I was sat down and told that he was back with the abusive girlfriend. I told him outright that I didn't support it and that I didn't want to be around her, but that didn't stop him from constantly bringing her over and allowing her to abuse me. As soon as my mother found out, she made it a requirement of the custody that the girlfriend wasn't around. That didn't stop the girlfriend's influence, though. When I got a boyfriend this year, my father was cruel to him and never allowed him to be over. Mind you, I was 16 turning 17 at the time and according to my dad, "very mature for my age". My boyfriend and I were in a very committed relationship (still are!) and often I would ask my father if he could stay the night. My mother allowed it so long as we didn't keep her awake (which we never did) and she knew we were safe and all that jazz. My father, however, believed that I would drop out of school and become a "knocked up slut" and forced my boyfriend to drive home at late hours of the night (3am-4am usually - it was the school holidays so we had no responsibilities during the day) instead of letting him stay the night. The amount of near-misses my boyfriend had due to fatigue while driving was scary. He lives out in a rural area and has to drive for half an hour to get home. On top of everything, the way he treated my boyfriend made me very mad with my father. One thing I forgot to mention is that my father returned to my basketball games when I was living with him. When he took it up again, he did statistics for each player and the team, which helped us improve and set goals. It was really cool and he actually ended up doing it for the state's womens basketball team and did the live television statistics. He was very dedicated to the team and the sport. One day my father just didn't turn up to a game. Everybody was wondering where he was and he hadn't said anything to anybody about him not being there. I messaged him after the game and asked him where he was. He said he could do whatever he wanted and that he didn't have to tell me anything. Cue massive argument where he blamed me, my mother, my boyfriend, my family and my friends for his behaviour and where he tried and failed to justify all his actions over the past few years. I left him a text saying that I was moving out of his home permanently and going back to my mother's. He called it an exaggeration and I told him that a lot of things happened to lead up to that point and he should only blame himself. We haven't spoken since. I moved out while he was at work.

Since then, he's only attended my brother's college graduation (where he insulted my mum and said things like "oh, what have you graduated from? you can't get a qualification" and "you've lost weight - it's about time. I've been telling you to do that for years") and he's sent me two messages. "Happy birthday, hope you are still enjoying your camera" (a camera which I bought with my own money while I was staying with him that he said he got me such a good discount on that it was basically his birthday present to me) and "Merry Xmas". Fucking pathetic.

I've since found out that he used to hit my little brother, he controlled everything about my mother - including moving her out of Germany to live in Australia where she had no family and was hated by his family; forcing her to get rid of all of nursing qualifications and be a stay-at-home mother, etc. He barely acknowledges that my little brother exists and then has the audacity to say that the poor child has autism (he's very introverted and dedicates his time to video games).

I can't say I hate my dad, but I just don't want anything to do with him.

/r/AskReddit Thread