[Serious]Redditors who are now married because you didn't know how to break up with your SO, how is that going for you?

Continued from the OP.

It got very messy from here on. I found out a lot of the facts of her affair, it was happening for almost 2 years, including whilst we was trying for our baby, during and after the pregnancy. I worked out the dates, and she saw him about 1-2 weeks before the estimated conceival date. I got a paternity test (she begrudgingly agreed to it). Thankfully he is my Son at least.

She started talking to my cousin again and they were very obviously planning a relationship. While I saw her on the times I picked up my son (we agreed for me to have him at weekends), we talked a lot of things out. I still had some feelings there and was very conflicted.

One day, I told her as much, but I didn't really know what those feelings were/if they were enough. I told her there was a chance I could take her back in time, but she'd have to drop all contact with the friend and cousin. She did both, backed up by text messages. Eventually I took her back and moved back in with her. We worked hard at it, but managed to get along. She gave me access to her phone for peace of mind about any contact with the cousin.

I was always worried about if she was talking to him again, did check her phone on occasion, I was very paranoid about it. I knew for a fact she still had feelings for him & that she'd talk to him if I let her. It got to the point where I couldn't move past the mistrust. We talked about it & agreed to give it a couple months (it was almost our sons first Christmas so wanted that together). If things didn't change, we would part ways.

Things didn't change, and I left. It was on pretty good terms and I left happy that although I couldn't save the marriage, I saved the friendship. We took our son out occasionally together, and stayed a bit too close at times. On valentine's day, she was texting me, making a move and sending pictures. Eventually I lost my control and went to her house. Outside was my cousin's car - she was having a meal with him while coming onto me!!

I banged on the door until she finally opened the door. I pushed my way in, found my cousin and floored him. I went to leave, she kept trying to push me about so I slapped her. The cousin came running to her aid, saying not to hit her etc....so I hit him again and left. They pressed charges against me, I had to give a statement & admitted to the full story. I got let off with a warning.

Since then we very rarely talk, only about our son when needed. Any other conversations tend to end up with arguments.

Thankfully, I am now in a much better relationship. It's early days, but so far everything is better in every way, so life worked out in the end.

TL;DR: Bitch went crazy, held down 2 affairs while we were planning/had a baby. Separated after 3 years, now happier than ever before.

/r/AskReddit Thread Parent