Not me. My mom. She has early onset dementia, was just diagnosed this year but she's had it for 4 years now. I noticed it during my last year of law school, but I lived far away. Upon graduation I moved home and my suspicions were confirmed.

She just retired. She couldn't work any longer. I think she's very frustrated by some things: she can't read well, which she loved. She can't drive, so she's lost a lot of her independence. It's hard for her to process information, take part in conversations, to follow movies. She can't cook well any longer. She doesn't like that people can be controlling or condescending about it; she's not a child, she's an adult who just can't do all the adult things. (And on my end, I often want to punch checkout clerks who are rude or impatient when she struggles with the credit card machines or with counting money). For the most part, though, she's very optimistic and positive. My mom never really was one to dwell on negative things. She was in denial for years, but she's accepted it now. We've all helped her straighten out financial and legal matters. Medical care will probably eat up retirement savings...could probably make that the USA's motto, though.

As for me, it's changed my life. I've deviated away from the standard career I envisioned because I needed to take time off, care for her, do a lot of things people my age don't worry about. I really wanted to be more professionally successful at this point, and I'm hard on myself; I feel I should have been able to juggle my mom's illness and care as well as my career goals...I've grieved for years, too. I'm young. I just wasn't prepared for this. Nobody is.

But some days are nice! Some days we get to go out to lunch, or have good phone calls, or laugh about our pets. She loves cannoli and there's this local place that does amazing ones, so when I drive her in for visits, we go there. Hell, some days all you can get out of life is a nice dessert, right?